meeting "the man" (Dixies BBQ)

The big thing about Dixies BBQ is this super special hot sauce called "the man". Typically, the owner walks around with a pot of sauce, asking if you've met "the man". If you haven't then you get one tiny drop from the end of a single tine of a fork. The idea is: it's hot.

menu

The thing about the man is it's basically dave's insanity. Maybe it's home made, maybe it's purchased and dressed up, but the theory is identical. It's tomato paste with pure capsaicin extract mixed in. If you haven't encountered it, there are two things you need to know about Dave's. 1) the extract makes it hotter than hot peppers. 2) it tastes like ass. The same applies to "the man".

So, as gimmicks go, it'll work on me the once.

But if I'm not going back for "the Man", am I going back for the BBQ? In a word, no. It wasn't really any good. Average at best.

Chicken BBQ

Also, the atmosphere is extremely uncomfortable. You wait in line forever, then you finally get into the kitchen and you find out why. It is run as a model of micromanagement. There's this huge lady sitting at the cash register directing nearly each movement of everybody else in the place. "Cook, you will make two pork rib plates. Now put them there. Now make three 520s. Line them up next to the other orders. Now stop. Now make two potato salads. Stack them, no, on that counter..."

Hey, it's potato salad.

And for some reason, they arbitrarily group 5 or 6 orders together before they hand them out. So you've paid, your order is sitting there a foot from you, and you're expected to wait for the 5 suckers behind you. Bah.

at least they have big tables

To cut a long story short, I don't expect to be visiting Dixe's again anytime soon.

[where: 11522 Northup Way, Bellevue, WA 98004]

Longhorn Outpost barbecue

I still like whistler better...*

Yep. That's some turkey. and vaguely hot sauce

Longhorn Barbecue Outpost is very near work. Which, to be honest, is probably the best reason to go. Unless you want to smell like wood smoke for the rest of the day (really, who doesn't?).

The smoke works though. My bus lets me off right outside. It's a kind of curse; on smokey days I'm ready for lunch at 8:45 in the morning. It also makes the turkey really really tasty. Everybody seems pretty happy with the redder choices as well.

My main beef with the place, other than the fact that it makes my puns extra bad, is it's overly cheesey, tourist grubbing style. Normally I take a pervese pleasure in these sorts of things, but Longhorn just doesn't click with me. Probably because I had to utter the phrase "I would like a Big Un" in front of my coworkers.

It is a pretty good sized meal for $7.95 (before tax).
But it's called a "Big Un".
Ug.

As I say, the turkey is good and smokey. The hot sauce isn't hot thought. I get the spicy, I assume the mild is just ketchup.

Recently, one of my coworkers wanted to find out what a nine dollar chili dog was all about. The counter dude claimed it was the best thing on the menu. I didn't get a full report, but I'm pretty sure he wasn't hungry afterward.

This hot mess is a chili dog. That's a lot of look.

Just call it a big bowl of chili. That's pretty much what it amounted to.

Anyway, if you're in π² and you want some meat, Longhorn is a place for you.

*Sorry for that. I couldn't help myself.

[where: 103 1st Ave S, Seattle, WA 98104]